Chels in Progress

There was a time in my life when God plucked me out of my comfort zone, and dropped me into a whole new environment.  I learned to rely on Him, trust Him, to look up to Him, much like when a child is scared or uncomfortable, they hold on tight to their parent's hand.  He taught me about grace and gentleness , patience and love .  My heart was light and full and bursting . But then, I was right back in a place I knew, and today I'm faced with the reality that I'm too comfortable again.  Today, I am burdened with the reality of my lack of grace .  In my striving to do well, I lost sight of people.  I was harsh.  I was uninviting.  My light was dim, and my love was small.  I was task-oriented before people-oriented.  I wanted to finish my job before serving. My heart was scrunchy and ugly today.  I was scrunchy and ugly today. In our striving, even striving for good things, we sin.  We stop relying on the Lord's stren...

Does this sound like a big feat?  Well, it is. Yesterday, my heart broke and I felt overwhelmed in grief for my mom.  She has been fighting MS for over 25 years, and watching it slowly take more from her is painful to watch.  Not only is she physically dwindling, but more so, her spirit is suffering.  I finally hit a wall, and I started bawling. So I sat with God and told Him how I felt.  I remembered that it was okay to dish it out.  He's big enough and strong enough to shoulder our grief, and more importantly, He cares about us.  So I laid it out there.  And then I slept on it. This morning, I wasn't sure what to think or feel.  I was all cried out, my eyes still puffy, and I just had to push through to get to work.  And then something happened.  I began to realize that I believed that God could intervene.  That God was truly there.  That He had me , as the Holy Spirit has been whispering into my ear all week. ...

Three of my dearest friends are graduating this Saturday from my alma mater. This weekend will mark one year since I received my bachelor's. Today I met up with these girls before we all disperse over the globe, and I began thinking about my life now. I am not where I thought I would be, not doing what I thought I would be doing, if you had asked me a year ago. But I am learning to be thankful. The time I thought would be spent elsewhere allowed me to become a youth group leader, to invest in the women around me, and for Father to bring healing to my family. I am learning patience, stillness, love, grace, mercy, and trust. The Lord has put desires in my heart that can only be from Him, which means I must've allowed Him in far enough for Him to scoop some ugly junk out and replace it with His beauty. Admittedly, it is often uncomfortable when people respond as though I haven't done a whole lot since graduating, but I no longer feel the need to justify where I am at. I d...